From NY Post- A hapless Mets fan tried to make a diving catch when her gold tooth fell into a Citi Field toilet — and got her arm stuck in the commode.

The unidentified woman’s bizarre Flushing adventure happened during last Wednesday’s game against the Atlanta Braves, sources said yesterday.

It’s unclear how long she was trapped screaming in the john, but stadium security guards and emergency medical personnel eventually showed up.

It’s unclear if the toilet had to be destroyed to free her.

There are some things in life which are worth both the risks of injury and public humiliation – fishing a tooth out of a public toilet is not one of them. I’d say the only reason you should ever even attempt this is if the object your after is a wedding ring. After that everything is off limits.

Two weeks ago I knocked a tube of toothpaste off the bathroom counter and into the toilet. I live alone, it is my toilet that only I use. Yet i was petrified of having to reach in and get the toothpaste. Maybe I’m a germaphobe, but I’d like to think the majority of humanity isn’t willingly shoving their hands and arms down toilets to retrieve objects.

At the very least I hope this woman gets a replacement tooth for free for the public embarrassment the ordeal has no doubt caused her. She will never be able to set face in Citi Field again.

In the spirit of the annoying but engaging commercials the NBA is running on ESPN, TNT and ABC, I have decieded to make a series of spoofs on these commercials. Mark Madsen of the LA Lakers dancing like an idiot during a Lakers championship rally.

I was lounging around on a lazy Saturday morning, flipping through the 200 or so channels I pay for which I never get a chance to watch, and I came across American Wedding. This is the final chapter in the more well known American Pie movie series. If you are in your 20’s you’ve no doubt seen or heard of such movies; they have introduced the term MILF into common culture, turned ‘band camp’ into a sexual deviant’s paradise, and made the penetration of pastry delights slightly less awkward. Read more…

Foxnews.com

IRAM, Ohio —  Someone has beheaded a statue of President James Garfield that was installed last week at an Ohio college.
Hiram College spokesman Shawn Brown says the vandalism was discovered Friday morning, just a day after the sandstone statue was dedicated on the campus in Hiram, 30 miles southeast of Cleveland.
Brown says the college is hoping the head will be recovered so the 95-year-old statue can be restored, but police have no leads in their investigation.

I’m honestly at a loss of words here, hasn’t the guy suffered enough after getting assassinated a few months into his term?
“Congratulations Mr. President! Your portrait is almost complete, the artist just needs a few more hours to work on it, your going to *bang*……”

The other thought I had is that the guy was president for like 2 months, yet is getting statues made and is still considered a president. Shouldn’t we have some type of law that says an individual needs to occupy the office for half a term to be considered a president?

I’m all for having a fun time with friends and doing things that are borderline illegal, but this is kinda sick and twisted. I guess living so close to Celevland does turn people crazy.

According to a March 2008 study 26.4 million American’s have started a blog. Lets add one more to this growing list!

Captain Polemic is a blog which will be different than anything you’ve ever come across mostly because the guys writing it have been told they are not right in the head. We are fairly well educated which makes for smooth reading, but by no means could you classify what you will see here as conventional.

Politics, Religion, Sports, Heroes of our Childhood, Public Service, Random Drivel; its all here for your enjoyment. So please, take a few minutes out of your day and engage your mind in the writings of Captain Polemic!